i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
