he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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