i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize