No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
