It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
