It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
