Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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