How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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