Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
My vagina just recognized that song.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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