I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
