Got a toothbrush?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
