I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
