I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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