It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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