the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Randomize
