is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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