I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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