Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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