yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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