no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
