I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
