so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
