i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
