Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
