Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
