Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize