this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Randomize
