discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
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