Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Randomize
