No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
