Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize