I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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