Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
bring money and cleavage
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
