ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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