Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
My vagina is officially offended.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
