i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
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