You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
