Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
