I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
