Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
She needs sedatives and a leash
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
