I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
