if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
