erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Randomize
