So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
