so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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