I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
