So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Boobs speak an international language.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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