he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
