ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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