the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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